Chapter 1

Malay clutched the chocolate bar and his ticket tightly in his fist as a group of young girls squeezed past his aisle treading on his toes, as he hurriedly tucked his feet in. He looked around him, yes, his seat had to be the best in the auditorium today. Lakshman kaka would come in an hour to pick him up. Until then he was a grown man, on his own, showing his ticket to the usher, making his way into the semi darkened auditorium and then perching confidently in the big chair. Was he a little scared ? Nah that must just be the thrill, adrenaline rush as they called it. His hands were sweating and the chocolate bar had gone soft. He unwrapped the bar, the chocolate sticking to his fingers, and took a bite.

The minister dressed in flawless white took the stage. Even his shoes were white, offset only by his slicked black hair. Malay chuckled to himself, 'Ermine-man, that sounded fine he thought'. The minister welcomed the performers to their town with all the eloquence that he could muster and after what seemed like an endless speech, the curtain finally rose.
Malay jumped up and clapped, he could hardly wait for the show to begin. In the rush he dropped the half eaten chocolate on his feet smudging his new Nikes. Well it did not matter so much he told himself, the show was finally beginning.
Carefully he folded the counterfoil of his ticket and put it in his pocket. They would check again during the interval, he had to be careful not to lose it. People settled back in their seats while the Joker and the cycling parrot took the stage. This was followed by the tigers following the ring master's whip and whims. Malay checked the program schedule again, yes after another performance it was the turn of the Russian acrobats to take the stage. Today it was Dimitri Illyich who was doing the act of the human top.

Two weeks back it was the image of the human top on a hoarding that that drawn Malay on his way back from school. Traffic blocked his view but he was captivated by that one glimpse. Boys his age wearing bright leotards spinning around inside gigantic hoops, while others leaped high in the air from the trampoline. Yet another balanced on his fingertips. That evening Malay cut out the ad from the day's newspaper and put it inside his Geometry book. For the next few days he and Puran had spent the entire lunch hour trying some of those stunts only to end up with soiled uniforms and some bruises. Puran's mom had not given him permission for today's show. "These human tops will give you vertigo" she said. She had almost succeeded in stopping Malay too, but he was smarter.

And yes now it was the turn of the Russian acrobats. Malay's heartbeat quickened. A young boy about his age took the stage. He started off with what looked like simple tricks and somersaults but soon he started forcing his body into the most unbelievable contortions. Two more boys came onto the stage and started juggling with fire. Malay kept moving his head like following a tennis match making sure not to miss a thing. The music changed tempo now and the acrobats moved back a little making way for the human top. Dimitri was a boy of about eleven. He took the stage with the litheness of an athlete, a dancer. He had a big hoop in his left hand and with a flourish he set it rolling, followed it around and then in the blink on a eye he was in the hoop stretching his limbs like the Vitruvian man, a full stretch. The hoop miraculously kept on rolling around the stage in tune with the music. Malay willed the young him on. Dimitri's face seemed to be flushed from the effort and the concentration. Malay watched with clenched fists and a throbbing heart hoping that the 'human top's' hands were not getting sweaty.
Everyone was sitting up on the edge of their seat now. The tempo of the music quickened as Dimitri executed a perfect jump. Once more, twice, thrice and on the fourth jump something went amiss. His foot slipped out of the hoop and he could not regain his balance. He hit the floor head first. The auditorium went up in a collective 'ohhh'. Malay's throat felt dry, he looked at the Dimitri's face. The boy was looking abashed almost guilty now, he was not badly hurt though. Malay felt embarrassed for him, wanted to reassure him. What might be going on in the young boy's mind ? Would he get up and and start performing again, his hands must be shaky from the exhaustion and the fall. Or would he gather his hoop and take a bow with an embarrassed smile ? For a professional this might not be as big a deal as Malay was making it out to be. Before Malay could contemplate further four more acrobats came onto the stage with a trampoline somersaulting high into the air. The crowd was distracted. The spotlight fell on them now. In the background Malay watched a small figure picking up the hoop and limping into the wings.


Dimitri Illyich with his gigantic hoop and Malay Bogate, they belonged to two different worlds yet hadn't both been cast out of the circle of comfort in front of an expectant audience ?
So what does one do after vouching for non-conformance? Malay knew he did not want to slink into the backdrop, he had to pick up the pieces and try again.